Nothing ruins the mood
Nothing ruins the mood during foreplay more than the recurring image of your sixty-five-year-old homeroom teacher trying to stretch a condom over a cucumber. Dennis Miller
Quotes for All
Nothing ruins the mood during foreplay more than the recurring image of your sixty-five-year-old homeroom teacher trying to stretch a condom over a cucumber. Dennis Miller
Me? I like wearing a condom. It means I’m having sex. I already spend most of my time NOT wearing one. It’s like a tuxedo – I enjoy putting one on for special occasions. David Mazzucchelli
The issue we are reluctant to talk about is even more sensitive than condoms. The issue – and I will try to be tasteful here – is that sometimes it seems like maybe the president of the United States is kind of dumb. If you get what I mean. What I mean is, I am … Read more
I have no ability to develop muscle tone. I could do situps all day and still look like a condom full of walnuts. Dana Gould
They had this movie called Juno about a teenage girl who gets pregnant and it’s nominated for an Oscar. That’s an unusual experience for me, ’cause when a black girl gets pregnant it ain’t no Oscar. It’s social work and a box of condoms is what that is. D. L. Hughley
Put a condom in their hand and hope it don’t bust. Coolio
Yesterday in Egypt, archaeologists discovered the burial site for the 50 children of Ramses II…Fifty children! What I want to know is, who decided to name a condom after this guy? Conan O’Brien
Arnold Schwarzenegger looks like a brown condom full of walnuts. Clive James
It needs to become as easy to get hold of a condom in a poor country as Coca-Cola. Clare Short
You know, the condom is the glass slipper of our generation. You slip it on when you meet a stranger. You dance all night, then you throw it away. Chuck Palahniuk