My friend goes through
My friend goes through the wedding section of the Sunday paper looking at the brides-to-be and picks out a Dog-of-the-Week. I think that’s cruel toward women. Myself, I look to see who shows the most cleavage. David Henry
Quotes for All
My friend goes through the wedding section of the Sunday paper looking at the brides-to-be and picks out a Dog-of-the-Week. I think that’s cruel toward women. Myself, I look to see who shows the most cleavage. David Henry
You can’t throw him back because he doesn’t meet the legal size limit. David Henry
Nothing can burst your fatherly bubble faster than hearing your daughter come home from a date and saying: ‘Some nights I don’t know why I even bother to wear panties’. David Henry
Whenever my teenage daughter comes down the stairs dressed like a tramp for her date, I think to myself: ‘Damn, why won’t her mother wear something like that ?’ David Henry
At a wedding last week, my wife said: ‘Isn’t the bride beautiful ?’ When I responded by saying, ‘Yeah, but her blowjobs aren’t half as good as yours’, she got all pissed off. Women – they can’t take a compliment! David Henry
Green clovers. Blue diamonds. Orange Stars. Pink hearts. Purple horseshoes. Man, I never know if I’m looking at a bowl of cereal or having another acid flashback. David Henry
If Adam had had a real hairy back, we probably wouldn’t be here today. David Henry
It was only after I untied my girlfriend from being face down on the bed that I learned her screaming, ‘Asshole!’ was a statement about my character and not an invitation or request. David Henry
I get all excited when I think that someone’s 1-900 sex call from a cell phone might be passing through my body right now. David Henry